ramblings of a lost mind!!

Well it's that part of the day again or shud i say that part of the night. I have known for a very long time now that there is definotely something between me and the nights. There's something which is so strangely invigorating and sometimes so strangely thought provoking. It's as if the only times when i truly feel at one with myself are the nights. And boy have these nights changed in the last few months.

I truly beleive I am living in some kind of a time warp. It seems as if life has moved on and yet the whole sensation sometimes becomes so numb and lost. It is kind of strange that despite being happy wih my life right now, there is somekind of loneliness which grips me all the time. and it's not some typical loneliness. Sometimes i wonder what or whom do i miss. But then i know what i miss is my beloved SCMHRD. I believe everyone gets attached to the place where they spend some part of their life but i am sure no one is so attached to this heavenly place as i am. What days they were. I found everything during my two years there, things that i wasn't even looking for. It's a constant battle that i fight with my memories theses days, a battle to preserve as many moments, as many memories, as many snapshots as i can and for as long as i can. And it's a battle which i know i eventually going to loose. And what a loss would that be. for I will loose some my most honest and my most happy moments. How many times i have smiled sitting alone thinking of some of the memories from scm. I think of room 114, of room 929, of ordering pizzas in the boys hostel of sitting in the library, of going to the neev room and the acads block at 3 in the night and being all alone there tryong to soak in the serenity and the calm of it, of sitting in front of the mess on that ledge with nidhi, of playing badminton with her, of playing tennis, of listening to songs while washing cloths (I have to come to songs later!!). And yes how can i forget the walks. The Walks. Boy do i miss them all. Do i always have a heavy heart and a mosit eye when I think of the experience that SCm was. Soetimes it's the people whom I miss (had written some names but deleted them because i didnt know who all to include) but most times it's just the campus. Some of my most memorable memories of those two years are the times that I spent on campus alone during summers and during the last few days our MBA. Those were the days when i really felt loved and happy. Loved by the campus. Don't know what all have I written and what is the flow. But there is so much that i want to write about; badminton, summers, walks, quzzing, chatting with rishi, neev, library, bakar, juniors.. damn!! if only i was a better writer. but yes all i know is this. I am in chennai now, life's good, am happy in my own way but what i think of every day, what make me happy, sad, smile, everything are the memories.